We are going to look at some material on grief. Grief is in a sense a part of life. Pets die. People we love die. One day we too will die. But we also grieve other kinds of losses. The loss of a job we loved. Loss of health. Loss of financial security. Loss of relationship due to moves or just growing apart. The list could go on and on, couldn’t it?
I want to being with an article by Elizabeth Groves from the Ligonier’s site.
Grief and the Christian
by Elizabeth Groves
We worship a big God.
He is sovereign and powerful.
We are in His hands, and nothing happens to us by chance.
Dodi Note: True? Do we all agree with this?
The author goes on to take us deeper.
That’s good news.
But in grief, if that is all we remember about God, it might actually make the pain worse, rather than better.
It might leave us thinking, like Mary and Martha (John 11:21, 32), “Lord, you could have stopped this, and you purposely didn’t.
Why?”
God’s sovereignty might leave us more angry than comforted.
So we need to remember some other things, too.
Dodi Note: Anyone else “get this”? I do. This article will mainly deal with actual death of a loved one, but much can apply to other losses.
Jesus Defeated Death
God hates death even more than we do.
That’s part of the reason Jesus came.
The wonderful news for us is that when Jesus broke death’s power by dying and rising from the dead, He did it not only for Himself but also for all who are united to Him (Heb. 2:14–15).
Hebrews 2:14-15 ESV 14 Since therefore the children share in flesh and blood, he himself likewise partook of the same things, that through death he might destroy the one who has the power of death, that is, the devil, 15 and deliver all those who through fear of death were subject to lifelong slavery.
NLT 14 Because God’s children are human beings—made of flesh and blood—the Son also became flesh and blood. For only as a human being could he die, and only by dying could he break the power of the devil, who had the power of death. 15 Only in this way could he set free all who have lived their lives as slaves to the fear of dying.
Dodi Note: If we try to live while at the same time being scared to death of dying then we can’t really live and enjoy life. If you have ever walked with a friend or a loved one who is dying, the choice during that time (and it could be months or years) is to enjoy the moments or live in dread and fear. I think that is what this verse means by being slaves to fear. They/we were unable to enjoy life.
Let’s join the author:
That means that those who die in Christ are more alive than ever and are experiencing life, joy, and glory beyond anything we can imagine, right now, in God’s very presence.
It may seem that the Lord did not “heal” or “protect” them, but in fact He has healed and protected them in a much fuller, deeper, more permanent way.
Dodi Note: I like this analogy she share:
When our oldest child went away to college, I expected to spend weeks feeling weepy from missing him.
But he was so happy there, and I was so happy for him, that I found I wasn’t nearly as sad as I had expected.
Similarly, when we know that our loved one is free, alive, and worshiping the Lord face-to-face with joy and abandon, it helps lessen our sadness.
Dodi Note: This is of course to the extent that we actually believe it to be true and can remember it.
We Grieve with Hope
First Thessalonians 4:13 says, “But we do not want you to be uninformed, brothers, about those who are asleep, that you may not grieve as others do who have no hope.” Notice that the text does not say that we shouldn’t grieve, just that we should grieve differently than those who have no hope.
Even in the context of hope, we still grieve, and that is appropriate.
Jesus Himself wept at His friend’s tomb.
The Bible does not dismiss or minimize grief, and we shouldn’t underestimate its impact.
But we grieve differently than those without hope.
Let’s say I don’t know Jesus, and I believe there is no further existence after death.
Then if my husband dies, he really is lost to me.
Every single thing that made him who he was—his quirky sense of humor, his passion for people (and basketball and popcorn), his warm smile, his open heart, all of it—is gone forever. That grief is a black hole.
But for those who die in Christ—and for those who grieve in Christ—the picture is very different.
The sorrow of missing loved ones is still incredibly painful, but the separation is only temporary. We will see them again. That is an entirely different picture.
Dodi Note: Agree? Disagree? Is it hard to remember sometimes? I think it is.
God Is with Us
In the midst of grief, it is critical for us to remember that the God who is sovereign and mighty is also Immanuel—God with us.
When our grief is debilitating and it feels impossible to function, God does not sit aloof in heaven.
He does not leave us to figure out how to handle grief on our own or how to cast about for resources to get through it.
He walks every step of the journey with us
.
Jesus came and lived as a human in this broken world.
He gets it.
He knows the tormenting thirst and weakness of life’s final hours.
As our High Priest who fully understands our heartaches, He intercedes for us (Heb. 7:25), as does His Holy Spirit (Rom. 8:26).
Heb 7:25 25 Therefore he is able, once and forever, to save those who come to God through him. He lives forever to intercede with God on their behalf.
Rom 8:26 26 And the Holy Spirit helps us in our weakness. For example, we don’t know what God wants us to pray for. But the Holy Spirit prays for us with groanings that cannot be expressed in words.
He calls us friends (John 15:15) and promises that He will never leave nor forsake us (Heb. 13:5), that His Spirit will dwell in us (John 14), and that He will give us peace (14:27; 16:33) and even joy (15:11; 16:22).
John 15:15 15 I no longer call you slaves, because a master doesn’t confide in his slaves. Now you are my friends, since I have told you everything the Father told me.
Heb 13:5 Don’t love money; be satisfied with what you have. For God has said,
“I will never fail you. I will never abandon you.
John 14:27 I am leaving you with a gift—peace of mind and heart. And the peace I give is a gift the world cannot give. So don’t be troubled or afraid.
16:33 33 I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world.”
15:11 11 I have told you these things so that you will be filled with my joy. Yes, your joy will overflow!
16:22 22 So you have sorrow now, but I will see you again; then you will rejoice, and no one can rob you of that joy.
What we need most in the midst of grief is God Himself.
AMEN???
He will meet us,
give us Himself,
fill the void left by our loved ones,
warm our hearts,
lift our burdens,
and draw us into the sweet balm of fellowship with His Spirit.
And as our Father tenderly swaddles us in His love,
our love for Him will grow,
our faith and trust will deepen,
and even amid the heartache of grief we will praise Him with deep and true joy.
Dodi Note: Does anyone have a testimony to how this has worked or is working out in your own life? Want to share?
This is something the Lord does by His Spirit, through His Word, prayer, and the fellowship and love of His people.
Those means of grace are not “tasks” for our to-do list—
more burdens placed on our grief-weary shoulders.
They are His love for us.
If in your grief you struggle to pray or read the Bible, ask someone to pray for you and read the Bible to you.
Grief is really, really hard.
It hurts like crazy.
But the Lord has broken death’s power, and therefore His children who have died are with Him.
And He is with us.
And before you know it, we will be together with Him and with them.
That removes death’s sting—it really does.
Even in the rending ache of grief, with the Holy Spirit’s help, we can hang on to Jesus and grieve with the hope that His death and resurrection bought for us.
https://www.ligonier.org/learn/articles ... christian/